|☥ load ☥|
we were all partying, although for some reason in the beginning of it all there was a tone of mourning. my parents were there and kept being fucky, but when my friends would be nice to them, they would instantly forget that they were shitty ass people. the party was in this weird massive hall with other rooms in it, but the hall reminded me of this hallway-type thing in stanford. i’m on my period right now in the waking world, and in my dream, i spilled something and tried to clean the floor looking for paper towels and accidentally almost grabbed underwear with a pad inside of it. at one point we went swimming in a pool and there were underwear with used pads floating in the water… and i ‘remembered’ about mine, and felt really embarrassed cause there were guys there, but there was actually a “pad station” manned by this enthusiastic girl, so i threw it at her and she piled it on top of this mattress-like cube of pads……………. anyways, I don’t remember who I was with, but people kept busting the party. after we left/escaped, I ended up with me and some other friend driving in the streets of new york city. We were lost and trying to get back home to jester, so I kept saying “just find the intersection of guadalupe and 24th!!” in the middle of new york city. it was so gta-like, because while we were driving, we swerved into the police station of new york city, but it was really intense. like not just cop cars and unmarked cars, but strange cars that were matte black and shaped like jets. and army tanks as well. we got stuck in there and were like “fuck” so we get out, and walk by this strange tube thing. I went to Six Flags recently and it was really reminiscent of this ride where you get shot STRAIGHT down (it was really fucking scary honestly but i was barred out but it was still fun.) We don’t know where the tube sucks the people to, but there’s a line of people to go into this hydraulic tube. the people are wearing normal clothes, and my understanding was, this tube was for secret government agents going to who the fuck knows where. so, me and my friend enter the tube, and it makes all these noises and flushes with water, and it sucks you through while you’re covered in water, and we ended up in Paris. so, we tried to navigate paris to be able to watch this beautiful pink sunset over a railing. That was my dream last night. and im hungover as fuck now
since it just art of war out here
nobody believe in middle ground
nobody believe in seeing situation over side
everybody just believe in fighting for something
just bc they want it no matter wut it really mean
Somebody at one of these places asked me: “What do you do? How do you write, create?” You don’t, I told them. You “don’t try”. That’s very important: not to try, either for Cadillacs, creation or immortality. You wait, and if nothing happens, you wait some more. It’s like a bug high on the wall. You wait for it to come to you. When it gets close enough you reach out, slap out and kill it. Or if you like it’s looks, you make a pet out of it.
“I’m meeting boys who like Charles Bukowski and they all want to do brutal things to my body. They tell me they buy a bottle of whiskey whenever they get one of his books and don’t stop reading till they’ve gone through a pack of cigarettes. They blow smoke in my face and say, “He was the…
they say that hell is crowded, yet,
when you’re in hell,
you always seem to be alone.
& you can’t tell anyone when you’re in hell
or they’ll think you’re crazy
& being crazy is being in hell
& being sane is hellish too.
those who escape hell, however,
never talk about it
& nothing much bothers…
- Neil DeGrasse Tyson (via whats-out-there)
A lovely note written by George Harrison to his father, date unknown
If I’m not awake before you & Eileen leave [you can give me a kick (and a cup of tea)] Thanks for coming! Sorry I’ve been mentally too diverted to have had more contact with you, [at least now I feel you can sense the diversity that I seem to have become the director/producer of:- and understand the problems involved in trying to do or be what we want,— in the limited time and circumstances we find ourselves in!] Anyway — Don’t ever worry or avoid whatever chance you can, to come and be with me [us] sometimes Im very Boring and was thinking of inviting ”Lou” and you’re new ”SON in LAW”? to Gladly come here on the 20th [as she requested] and try my ”best” to enjoy them and be a good ”little brother” [I’d prefer Billy Preston tho’] Never the less — to kill ‘10 Burks’ with 2 stones come back with Eileen for the ‘Lou’ period — and between the bunch of us — we could possibly have a laugh [and a cry] and confuse her in one easy lesson! and save her feeling unwanted — God Bless her!
If you can, then I’ll try to be less busy so we can make up for the missing moments (that I dont enjoy missing) whilst you are Here! God Bless — Hare’ KRSNA — Love you & thanks for Being my DAD.
(Speak to you later, when you’re Back)
P.S.S. Drive safely and tell Eileen that she comforts me — because until I got to know her, a little more,— I thought ”I” was the LOONEY-EST person I knew.
P.S.S.S. thanks for the “spiritual uplift”!!